Hey sluts and hoes. This is my first time using this piece of shit so depending on how much I like it I might keep up with it. If I'm that interesting to keep up with for that matter. Whatever. Hey, I'm Roxy and I have a problem. Now this problem may have something to deal with the nation in the state it is in today. Or the fact that men aren't just up to par as they should be. Just get over the fact that you're not 'MAGNUM' sizes gentlemen because your pinky-sized peen just isn't doing it for me. But that's besides the point in this case, I'm not here to talk about my sex life. But the fact there are people in this country who don't have sex lives. Yes, this is a horrible epidemic that I just discovered not but two nights ago when I ended up going home with a "generous tipper". Now, I'm pretty sure by this time a thirty-seven years old man would have been expected to know the general do's and don'ts of fucking some impressionable young lady.
Apparently this guy didn't. Nor did he even now what a proper fuck was. So people, please. Please let your children watch porn. Accidentally walk in on mommy and daddy bumping uglies. Otherwise they'll end up sitting in bed with a stripper who is trying not to laugh at them because OMG WTF DO I DO NEXT came up in the foreplay. I'm willing to offer up instructional boards and videos for people who have this problem. If you're not getting laid then you're possibly just some hopeless guy who lives in their parents basement playing Dungeons and Dragons 24/7 and that's no way to live. Even if you do have to pay for sex. At least make it good sex. For both yourself and the stripper who thought it'd be nice to do something for the side of man for once in her life. Especially since it was a man. A hairy, omfg is that King Kong-chest sort of man. I swear he had more of a bush on him them me it took me hours to find his dick. I had to use a machete and dress up like Indiana Jones. I have to go to therapy now.
ETA: INSTRUCTIONAL VIDEO MADE!
Spread it my friends. Every time someone has bad sex God kills a kitten.
Apparently this guy didn't. Nor did he even now what a proper fuck was. So people, please. Please let your children watch porn. Accidentally walk in on mommy and daddy bumping uglies. Otherwise they'll end up sitting in bed with a stripper who is trying not to laugh at them because OMG WTF DO I DO NEXT came up in the foreplay. I'm willing to offer up instructional boards and videos for people who have this problem. If you're not getting laid then you're possibly just some hopeless guy who lives in their parents basement playing Dungeons and Dragons 24/7 and that's no way to live. Even if you do have to pay for sex. At least make it good sex. For both yourself and the stripper who thought it'd be nice to do something for the side of man for once in her life. Especially since it was a man. A hairy, omfg is that King Kong-chest sort of man. I swear he had more of a bush on him them me it took me hours to find his dick. I had to use a machete and dress up like Indiana Jones. I have to go to therapy now.
ETA: INSTRUCTIONAL VIDEO MADE!
Spread it my friends. Every time someone has bad sex God kills a kitten.